Windsor Castle

89 Albert St, Prahran 9521 1867
Score: 19/40
The Windsor Castle makes me sad. This place smacks of potential, but just ALWAYS disappoints.

A friend who was going away to Europe for a few months had a leaving lunch at the WC (note the irony) so I didn’t have much choice but to head on over.

At the bar things always go well. The staff a friendly, funny and always game for a laugh. But head into the dining room and things go well and truly awry.

Heading over to order at the counter, it doesn’t matter what day or time you’re there, the staff are always grumpy, unfriendly, unhelpful and just generally a bit of a pain in the pie-hole. On this occasion, add to that list dim-witted and incapable and you’re starting to get an idea about how badly things worked out.

Almost everyone’s orders were incorrect. And when the female staff member realised this, she got very shirty…with US?! Then, when she thought that she’d under-charged someone, she actually came over to the table and asked for the difference – which she later returned when we pointed out that our guest had, in fact, paid the right amount. It was eye-rollingly bad service.

The next issue was portion size. This place is not cheap, for a pub. It’s a full kitchen that aims to please with more than just a defrosted parma. But if you’re going to charge the prices, I hope you can deliver.

Wild mushroom agnolotti with leek sauce, ricotta and truffle oil ($16/$21) was OK. But the serving was measly. Four agnolotti does not a main course make

The steak sandwich was tasty, according to the diner sitting next to me, but when I dove in to steal some chips (it took me around 35 seconds of strong self-control to resist), imagine my shock that they were cold. Cold and sad little chippies.

The pork belly with braised savoy cabbage, smoky bacon, parsnip puree and caramelised jus ($26) was one of the only triumphs of the day.

I chose a smaller dish of prawn spring rolls with sweet chilli peanut sauce ($10). Surprisingly a generous portion, hot and fresh, but really nothing special.

This is a lovely cosy venue in a great spot away from the hustle and bustle of crazy Chapel Street. But they continuously disappoint with grumpy wait staff and sub-par food or portions. When they get it right, it’s fantastic, but I’m not game to keep trying in the blind hope that they might accidentally score a point.

Beers only for me, thanks.

Atmosphere: 6/10
Service: 2/10
Value for money: 5/10

Food: 6/10